Saturday, June 24, 2006

AAAAHHH Summer "Vacation"

Well, I've returned, but only for two days then I'm off to Utah, Wyoming, and Florida!!! (which means I probably won't get to blog for about three weeks but when I get back I'll have good stories (and hopefully pictures!)

I've been gone all week .....you know relaxing, living the good life, getting a massage twice a day, eating great food, and being pampered ................in MY DREAMS!!! Actually, I was at Girls Camp eating food cooked over a fire by 14 year olds, sleeping.... but just barely, relaxing.....but only during bathroom breaks, wearing the same outfits two days in a row because my clothing rations were whittled down to nothing in the pudding/cool whip "incident", fighting off mosquitoes the size of Manhattan, and having adventures you thought only happened in cartoons!

I got to camp early on Monday hoping to score the best place for a tent before the "crowd" got there. I'd been drinking pop all the way up there so by the time I arrived I was about to pop! I was relieved (hehehehe pardon the pun) to see porta-johns right across camp.

There was a lot of work going on by the maintenance crew, spreading mulch on the paths and filling in potholes in the road with gravel but I managed to cut through all the "traffic" and make it to the potty in time. It's hard to tell this part delicately so just bear with me. I entered what would soon be dubbed by fellow campers as PortaStink #1, locked the door and had no more than seated myself when a HUGE commotion began outside.....CLOSE! Within seconds I felt my little abode moving sideways....at first I thought the fumes were making me dizzy but I could see through the little vent thingy that the earth was definitely moving beneath me.

I heard an engine rev and then Thump, Bump, AAAAGGGHHHH! The entire porta-potty was lifted into the air. I started screaming but the engine noise was so loud they couldn't hear me. In my minds eye I could see those big flat bed trucks driving down the highway carrying their load of porta-potties.......I was sure they were going to be loading me up any second......we were bouncing along down the road me screaming and pounding on the door as we went.

When I finally managed to get "decent" enough to open the door (wouldn't you know I'd be wearing my "ModesTee", great invention....but there's no hurrying it) we'd gone quite a little ways, I threw open the door and looked right into the eyes of a 20 something young man driving the bobcat that was carrying MY toilet away with ME in it! I was scared but trust me ........he nearly had heart failure! I'm not kidding.....true story!

Today I'm trying to recover a little before we leave tomorrow to go out West. Every year I think this will be my last at camp but it's a little like having a baby......hard, uncomfortable, and you swear you'll never do it again but when some time has passed you feel like it was all worth it and next thing you know you're 9 month's pregnant (or in my case sleepin' in a tent!).

Here's to summer vacation! Sure Love Ya! (P.S. More camp adventures to follow!)

14 comments:

Code Yellow Mom said...

Ha! LOVE the last paragraph about camp and pregnancy - I heard my mom say so many times that she was never doing girl's camp again - I think she went about twelve years in a row. :)

I'm about to head to Utah and Co to visit the fam this week, too. Have a fun trip!

Code Yellow Mom said...

Oh, and my mom has seven kids...so you're comparison is accurate, I think. :)

Grammy said...

I can't believe that! That is a story that will become a girls' camp legend for all time. They are even likely to write a song about you & "the Great Porta-Potty Adventure". Wow!

I figure I have been a leader at about 17 camps (if you include YW, Brownies & Girl Guides) and nothing that exciting has ever happened to me.

And you lived to tell the tale. I am so impressed!

Have a Great vacation.

sweet mama entropy said...

Okay. I don't know if I've ever laughed so hard at a blog post before. My poor husband is probably wondering what's wrong with me.

I don't know which was funnier - the portable porta-potty story or the pregnancy analogy (especially as I sit here very pregnant indeed and wondering "Why did I do this. Again?" Hilarious. Can't wait to hear your other adventures. Have fun on your trips!

Sarah said...

That is the funniest thing ever! You just made my day! I wish I could have seen the look on that guy's face!

Patti said...

How come I didn't hear about this on the phone!?

Actually, as a jaded daughter of yours, having lived to see you through many such experiences, I am not all that amused.

Just Kidding! How do you do it? That is literally the funniest thing I have read yet. I can't wait to hear the rest!

Tiny said...

Mom! haha...i remembered you told me that one on the phone, and i still laughed out loud. You're actaully out here in Utah with me now, but while i'm sitting in my work BORED....youre out rumping around SHOPPPING. So now you know what i REALLY do at work!

Gabriela said...

What a story! I totally would have freaked out. Ewwwwww. I hate going in those things under the best of circumstances (who doesn't?), but next time I'll have your story on my mind (I'll probably look for someplace in the woods!).

Have a great trip!

Blackeyedsue said...

I have wondered if that has ever really happened to anyone...LAUGHING MY GUTS OUT!!!!

You will never live that one down, and just WAIT until one of the girls brings it up in her Sacrament meeting youth talk.

Still laughing!!!!

momofalltrades said...

ROFL! That is the funniest thing I've read all day!

I followed you over from Papa Rocks. When you see a fellow WY girl, you gotta stop in and say hello! LOL

momofalltrades said...

Oh! And I was going to tell you about www.shadeclothing.com...like the ModesTee, but no snaps! They are just cut longer to help cover that part...and that might be quicker for someone who finds herself in your..ahem..predicament! LOL

Anonymous said...

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH I canNOT believe that happened to you! Didn't anyone SEE you get in? Don't they check to make sure no one is in it before they start moving it???? That is seriously just HORRIBLE! I'm glad you have a good attitude about girls camp. Me? I HATED every minute of it. Right down to testimony meeting where one girl ripped me up one side and down the other (1st year at camp) and no leader did anything to stop her until it was too late. Finally after going 4 times I asked if I didn't have to go again...come to find out I didn't have to go the previous 3 times.

BrookeJean said...

I just spent 10 min. trying to recover from the laughing spell your blog put me into. Thanks for adding the extra minutes to my life (I've heard that for every time you laugh you live longer). Enjoy your time in the West! I love it out here!

Grammy said...

Are you ever coming back? I miss you.